Today’s the day.  Today’s gonna be the day I have a conversation with her.   Today’s gonna be the day I invite her to happy hour or find out what she’s doing this weekend or what she does for a living.  Something.   Anything!   It’s just gonna happen TODAY.

What used to take me seven seconds, now takes me three as my eyes go straight to her usual spot in the room.   There she sits, and the space next to her is open.  

Be cool.  Be normal.

I set up my things and smile at Allie.   Noah and Allie, still can’t believe the coincidence.   I wonder if she’s made the connection.     We have matching sports drinks today and I make some kind of stupid, inaudible comment about it.  

“What?  Did you say something?”
“Nah, just talking to myself.”

Real cool Noah.   Real normal!

“So how are you, Allie?  It’s nice to see you again.”
“I’m amazing, thank you for asking.” 

She’s amazing.   She sure is.   Class starts and I make it a point to smile at her everytime she looks my way.   She’s the best distraction.   As soon as class ends, I turn to her and set out to complete my mission.

She tells me about her day, her half hour commute, and how people never believe she’s as old as she is.   I’m pinching myself cuz she’s really talking to me, like we’re really friends, and this is really real.   As soon as she’s done, there’s this awkward silence…  I don’t mean to make it awkward but I’m just so mesmerized about it all.   

“I have to go get ready.  I’ll see you tomorrow Noah.” and she walks into the locker room.    We both walk out at the same time — she’s showered and she smells freakin’ AMAZING.  What is that?  It smells like heaven, and she is the angel. 

“Someone smells really good and it definitely isn’t me,” I say.  I tilt my head and look her way.   She smiles.  
“Thats what happens when you take a shower…with soap!” She says jokingly.   She’s beautiful AND funny to boot?   OMGah.

I chuckle for a second and when I open my eyes, I all of a sudden notice the ring on her finger that I’ve failed to notice before…. and its on her left hand.   My stomach turns into knots and the smile fades from my face like I just found out my puppy died.  My heartbeat isn’t irregular or under the influence — it’s completely null and void.  I have just died. 

Be cool.  Be normal. 

Do I say something?   Do I say anything?   I end up saying nothing as I watch her walk out the gym doors.  And just like that, she’s gone.  Again. 

“By lettin’ her pass I had proved to be a better man. 
She keeps on passin’ me by.”